A letter to 16 years old Ain Irdina

A letter to the past,

To my dearest cubemate, 

I'm currently writing from the future. I had a very peculiar dream these past few days.

Of you and me munching Hup Seng dipped in Milo , in the middle of the nights.
Of you and me, blocking the entrance of EO to watch movies together every time after exams.
Of you and me, going to surau together, iftar together, terawih together.
Of you and me, talking to each other from the other side of the toilet cubicles.
Of you and me, throwing socks and other things to the cubes beside us.
Of you and me, calling each other with weird names and eventually stuck with 'Kubis'. *God. I still think Lobak is way cuter.
And most of all, in my dream of the past,
I saw us, wondering about our future.
Well, let me tell you about that... I'm not really sure about other future but what I can say about us is; we are still going strong :) 

Past Kubis, don't worry. Things work perfectly fine. You thought you couldn't endure a few things yet here you are, in the future ; couldn't be more contented with what you have.

Thank you for surviving the past years and still be here today. And alhamdulillah, both of us are still alive to be celebrating another year of blessings. 

Dear cubemate, I honestly love you for all the peptalks and gentle reminders, I don't think I can thank you enough. I hope your past self is happy to hear this .
Happy Birthday, from your cutest cubemate (2016)

Swimming right was taken

These past few days during study week, I realized that I easily got tired. 

No joke, guys. 

Even climbing up a flight of stairs can make me run out of breath. You could see me telling the people in front of me, huffing and puffing with " Waaaiii..t." and followed by, "Tha..nk y...ou," as I gasped for more air after they opened the door (connecting doors from car parks to our lobby) for me. 

And, it's only a flight of stairs. 

I don't know why. 

Okay. We all know why. 

I'm no longer in shape ! 

My face is getting more round. And my tummy is not as flat as before. Well, it's still okay but not as flat. I don't want to go further but all I can say, I'm not as fit as I used to be. I used to be able to do more than 10 minutes of jumping jacks and now, I don't even dream of getting out of the bed. 

If before, despite not liking the track, we still went to jog around the campus. All we do now is counting how many more bags of chips left and when should we go out to buy more. 

With us being us, I have to cook more portions of rice too. 

Seriously,

Dear Lord, what has gotten into us. 

So this evening, as we came back from our grocery shopping (again! Oh the irony) and discussed on how fat we have became, we decided to go down for a swim.  

Also, when was the last time we went for an exercise ? Was it 3 months ago ? God. 

The pool looked quite empty with only a few Arab kids playing with each other, so it would be less embarrassing if I couldn't catch my breath after like ... 1 meter. Haha. 

Okay. Should be fine. 

And so we changed into the suit and went down, all giddy to get our skinny old-self back. 

Took the shower. Entered the pool and glided to the other side of the pool. And oh boy. Did.I.get.heavier?

I pedalled so hard and I moved only like a few inches ! Unbelievable. I thought a mermaid would always be a mermaid. Now I know why King Arthur rarely swim here and there. Must be hard for him. 

And man oh man, my prediction was true. I had to literally stop in the middle of the pool and catch my breath (not the while-swimming one. But the I-am-tired-let-us-pause-for-a-five-seconds). 

Seriously, 

Dear Lord, what had gotten into us.

Half an hour later, as these water bugs were doing some in-the-water exercises (gave up on trying to swim at this point) , the guard came to Nana and told her we should be wearing a complete suit. 

"But ,,, we are." 

"With a cap."

"But I'm wearing my tudung. Like a swimming cap, it covers my hair also. Same purpose."

"No. A cap."

Bruh. Are you for real ? 

We told him we're sorry and we won't do it again. He said okay and walked away. 

A few minutes later, another guard came and told us the same thing. But this time, he insisted that we have to go out. 

Okay. 

Whatevs. 

Not that I really wanted to swim anyway. Pffttt.

But seriously, 

Dear Lord, what has gotten into them. 

We used to come here almost every other week last time. And, WE LIVE HERE. When did they change the rule. Why is there no notice or notification? 

So that's it. I'm not gonna swim in a cap. Of course I have to wear tudung. 

Now, maybe we can try going to the gym in the common room. 

Or do we have to strip for the gym too ? 

Urgh. Seriously.

You guys should watch it too

Last night I couldn't sleep and was constantly questioning my state of mind. I mean, after watching Stonehearst Asylum , I'm sure everyone feels the same way.
It was greatly done and I would rate it as 8/10.

Watched it with my other two girls with lights off and I seriously didn't have a clue about what the story was about. Didn't even watch the trailer. 
We were wondering on what to watch and Mayra just popped out "Stonehearst Asylum best." and we're like, "Okay. We'll watch it tonight."

And so we did.
It was not horror.

But it was good.
Just my kinda genre.

Basically, the story is about an asylum and a Dr. went there for his kinda intern thing. I don't wanna spoil anything , so if you're planning to watch, don't even read the descriptions or watch the trailer. Just watch. I watched the trailer afterwards. So many spoilers.


Trust me and just watch it. Well, if you're in the same boat as my genre (thriller but not horror haha) , you will love this movie.  Byeee.

Postponed Me-Time

To be honest, I had to attend an event at SK Sungai Gelugor today. To make the long story short, I had a presentation for my class (also today) and gotta leave the program to others. Felt sooo bad as I really wanna go and join them. But yeah, couldn't avoid the clashes.
Alhamdulillah, everything went well. I wouldn't know even if they lied but yeah, it went pretty well. 

After coming back from our presentation, I was already tired and it's Friday ! Yay to Friyay ! Haha.
Anyway, we changed into our robes, switched on our laptops and started pigging. I was all set for my weekends.

Sepasang Anis.
Anis Fakhira & Anis Farhana

Just before I could hit the upload button on my Insta Story, I received a notification on my WhatsApp,

Deborah asked in the group; "Guys, where's the meeting."

And I was like...
"We have a meeting today ?"
*smashed my head on the wall
What. How. Why. Whennn did they decide this.
God.

"I don't think I can go, Deb," I told my assistant and she told me to rest because according to her, "You sound like you're sick Anis. Have plenty of rest." Yeah. I was so exhausted and worn out by this evening. It had been a super long week.
Thus, I updated Deborah on our department and asked her to inform me with anything new. Since she's my assistant, I'm technically there hahaha so I hope others would understand.
I promise this is the first and the last time, guys. I have never skipped any meeting before.

Just before I could put my head on the pillow, I noticed that Azim had not sent me any photos from the program earlier. *another gelabah itik moment.
I have finished writing the coverage for Utusan Melayu and they're expecting it by this evening. Can't send the write up if there's no photos. And we paid thousands for that. No no. What's he doinggg ? Why I can't reach him ? *gelabah leveled up *run here and there
I'd reminded everyone in the group for a few times already since last night.
And Azim himself agreed to do it.

I started to panic. We promised to submit at 3.

I texted Azim again.
.
.
.
No reply.

It's already past 3.

Texted Azim again.
.
.
Was ignored too.
So I settled other things first.

5.05 pm he replied me, "Why you didn't tell me earlier. I'm out since morning."

-_-  Bruh ? It's your job. I'm just reminding you here to make sure you did your job. 
.
.
.
And,
6.30 pm, I received the photos. . .

...

Oookaay. Thank you.


Nana had finished watching a few movies already by that time and I was just about to choose one. . .

Anis and Glasses

Again, I lost my glasses.

Here I am, sitting in front of my laptop, with flashbacks of my undertakings from half an hour ago. It sat still on my nose bridge , the last time I can recall.
Maybe it will come back again to me tomorrow. If I sleep. Like it always does.
Or just like most times, maybe Nana and Mayra will come to me with, "Anis. Glasses." like they always do. Well, I hope they will. Cos I can't find my glasses when everything around me is all blurry like a low quality YouTube video.

Last week, while we're on the ride from classes, Mayra wondered how would it feel if we can take off our body parts and have to reassemble them like how we have to put on clothes and tudung before going out.

"If so, you will not only hear me asking 'have you seen my glasses' every morning but also, 'guys, where is my leg?' and 'any idea where i put my ear?'"

I thank Allah for He did not make us do that. Because, me going to classes without nose is possible. Hahaha.

I swear I put them at one particular place ; our dressing table. Still, they're not there whenever I need them the most. I have three pairs (2 in Penang, 1 back at home) but as you might have guessed , their mysterious disappearance is one enigma I can't simply solve. There're times when I lost all three and there're times when I lost only 1 or 2 of them, so I can find the missing one with the available one. But tonight, with everyone being asleep, no one can help me to find them. And here I am, lying on my bed, head spinning to moments and sequences of my routines. Where could they possibly be ?

Are they in a secret meeting somewhere? Are they plotting something against me?Is there any unresolved revenge between us ?

God I wish no.

Or is there ?

Mayra's Birthday surprise

This is going to be lengthy. 

Our not-so-little-anymore chicken is eventually 21 ! 

Three of us are now legit adults. Finally. 

Planning birthday surprise for Mayra was not an easy one since the very beginning. 

1. We intended to make a small private celebration at The Alley. She loves the matcha tart there. Called the cafe, they didn't offer such service for party. Pfftt. It's not like we asked for a bomb. 

2. If we surprise her at our house, it required her away from us...which can RARELY happen. Impossible to throw this woman away. A total leech. Hahaha.

3. Got Sir Yasir agreed to take her out for dinner...and, he just had to cancel the plan all of sudden, at the very last minute. 

4. On the evening before, Mayra was upset on a few things. She wanted to cry. She's not happy. Me and Nana ? Nervous levelled up. 

Her birthday was on Wednesday, so on Tuesday, Nana and I had already started planning this and that. Knowing Mayra and her deep attachment with toys and child-like things, I proposed to Nana,

" Let's build a fort." 

and she said okay if I know how to. Duhhh. Fort ? Piece of cake. *flipshair. 

So that noon, we found ourselves arranging chairs and clothesline as we tried our very best to peg the bedsheets together. Took out sheets, pegged here, pegged there. Pegged, pegged, spread, sheets fell.
Straightened, pegged, clothesline falling down.
Okay.
Despite how easy they should've been, they kept on falling onto the floor like a drama queen trying to get attentions. Dramatic. And annoying. Can't these things defy gravity for at least once. Huh.
Tried again, still not working.
Okay. We're officially doomed.

"I swear it looked easy on YouTube !" 

I moaned towards Nana as she shot me with the are-we-really-making-a-fort look . I mean, those people just arranged the chairs, spread the sheets and voila, a sturdy fort right on your face. And not to mention, the video was only 4 minutes! God. How come ours looked like ... NOT even close to a fortress , or as Nana put it, "macam tempat sidai baju rumah setinggan". Urgh. It was. 

We stopped trying and decided that we would be happy enough if anything, anything at all, would stay in place later that night. 

Evening came and I was in charge of buying the decorations and food. I left casually to my class and headed to the mall to buy the bits and bobs of the decorations with Nana's desperate order constantly playing in my mind,
"If you find a tent, do not hesitate. Just buy. We are soo not building a fort."
Yea right. Like I was going to buy a freaking tent just because. Haha

As you know, or might not know, I'm currently on 'Shopping Detox'. We had been avoiding malls for almost a week now. I know right ! It's impossible! How do people even live!

I was very proud of myself for being able to go to Mr DIY only. And I picked a reasonable shop. One step closer to the 'Pengguna Bijak' trophy. This is going to be easy, I told my self as I swiftly jumped from one aisle to another, successfully avoiding eye contacts from the unrelated sections.

After half an hour, I had gotten myself  a few packets of scented candles, 3 wrapping papers and a lighter. Easy job. 

Humming 'This girl is on fire', I headed to the counter with a big smug plastering on my face, looking very pleased with my achievement.
Got my things.Was not distracted. Girl, you're on roll! *pats self on the back

And then,,, 

the Christmas ornaments just had to be there, in front of the counter. . .
I quickly texted Nana , "Hey, should we buy the Christmas lights ? It's super cheap." 

Or. 

Maybe we don't need the lights. 

Maybe we can use other things.
Should I buy tassels? Or anything shiny?

Oh .

I should probably go and just glance at the crafts section real quick. Like, super quick, it wouldn't do any harm.

.

.

.

An hour later, I texted Nana, "I'm weak :(" 

The washi tapes were seriously super cheap wehhh ! 

and the notebooks ! All cute and super cheap ! 

They even sell cross-stitch equipments ! I don't know why I was excited about that, I don't even cross-stitch. But now that I know they sell it, I might buy and start on you know, have my own yarn collection, or frames of cross-stitch collection.
Wooden alphabets? Might need them. 

and Gosh! Felt for beginners? Right into the trolley. 

Man, I was hyperventilating. 

Nana replied with "Anis ! FOCUS ! We gotta focus!" Oh Lord. It was hard. After some serious breathing controls, face fanning and sweaty palms, I ended up adding ONLY the accessories for the party. *plays victory sound effects *waves hankie in the air "I did it, peasants, I did it !"

Since I had spent so much time at Mr. DIY, I had to rush home for Maghrib and didn't have the time to get Domino's and J.CO. So yeah, I didn't get any food. Because of the crafty section. Not my fault. Their fault. For having cheap stuffs. 

Came home to the news of Sir Yasir cancelling on Mayra and she's gonna be home for the rest of night, I couldn't think of any other solution. How are we going to set up the fort with Mayra walking here and there in the house?
As usual, Nana worried so much, she was about to cry.
"Okay. If she is not going to be outside, we will have to kidnap her and tie her down in the kitchen. Lock the door and we will straight away do the deco."  Her eyes sparkled with 'Yasss let us do that' and I laughed. "I was just joking ! We're not gonna tie her. She's gonna be anxious !"
 "Or should we?"
Woman be crazy. I was only joking for the love of God and she was all, "I seriously agree. Let's do whatever it takes." for the nth time. Whoa whoa chill, lady.

Due to the fact that Mayra was quite depressed that night because of some work, I pestered her to take Xanax in addition to her other pills. Hahaha.
I didn't want her coming all depressed to her own party okay. I have gotten everything 60% ready, didn't wanna toss them into the drain haha #hadtobeselfish #thatkindoffriend #shouldhavegivenonetoNana #womanneedstocalmdown

Fortunately, she did and dozed off soundly as early as 11 p.m. And we began working on our small project. Weee.

Kiki came back home with Domino's pizzas and Banana Kaya later on while Nana and I were wrapping the presents (Your welcome, Haziq). We set the fort up and just used our bed frame and hanged the curtains instead, completely ignoring the instructions from YouTube. 

The idea just came out of nowhere and I instantly knew that I am just creative by nature. #flipskening 

                                      

The tassels and scented candles.

The fort ceiling was actually a curtain too haha

Birthday Pizza

Since Mayra was already on Xanax, no sound could bother her and we had to literally dragged her out of bed. We came into her room, brutally calling "Mayra, Mayra, subuh subuh." She couldn't look more clueless. We sang happy birthday and she straightly went "Ya Allah you guys!" with her shrieking voice. Hahaha. She was clearly high and happy (not sure if it was the effects of it or she really was. Couldn't decide haha) with the surprise and we were super glad it's finally over. Our effort was paid off. And more importantly, we got to chug down pizzas in a fort while having a good laugh. The night went by unexpectedly smooth and couldn't get any more wild, with Nana waking up to a glow stick in her armpit. We surely had a ball of time.

Your Highness, literally high.

One with housemates :)

Banana looks like a proud mom lol

And yasss , matching robes with my girls

No we don't love you

Mayra used to loathe her birthday so much but we managed to make her change her mind, or so a lil bit, I guess ahaha.

Happy 21, my chicken. May Allah give you the strength to face your days and make them a wonderful ride. I pray that you will stay sweet and kind like you have always been. And I pray that God will grant you with more sense of humour too but not more than mine. May you be blessed abundantly and know that I am super glad you are born into this world coz where else am I gonna hear a person screaming so much every single time.  Haha. We love you too and we will always do.